Konami used to make some great games. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (arcade and home versions other than the original NES game). Contra, Castlevania, Gradius, and X-Men (arcade) to name a few. One title that fans seem to have forgotten Konami released is a little arcade game called Crime Fighters. This brawler was available in two versions – two player and four player. You are going to be fighting the urge to rage quit a lot. If you think Contra is hard or that Castlevania on NES then Konami has a surprise for you. Beating the NES Dragon’s Lair without taking damage is easier than one quartering Crime Fighters. Then you are in for a ride that makes those games look like church cake walk sales.

Crime Fighters features a varied circus

Characters run quite a gamut here. One, a punk rocker boss that didn’t realize the ’80s would eventually end. Another is a sweatpants wearing Dolph Lundgren look alike that shows up in level two. Seriously, Cuphead, while hard, is nowhere as hard as Crime Fighters, though for distinct reasons.

I must say, I am a huge fan of Crime Fighters. After playing through it on my GPD XD using MAME (I know, piracy and all that jazz) I must wonder if my love for this game is severely misplaced.

Pixel art stands tall still today

Graphically, Crime Fighters holds up well, even today against some stiff competition in the scrolling brawler world (have you played Mother Russia Bleeds yet?). There are tons of minute details in the backgrounds. On level one there are banner posters in the background. Some feature partial nudity, and other tiny details that you won’t have time to take in. On the subway car there is debris littered about, including what appears to cigarette butts and other assorted discarded items. Level three features store fronts with unique styles and colors.

The levels often have little interactive bits – including billboards that fall. There are interactive moments as well if you take the time to find them. Konami certainly did their best to keep the action in Crime Fighters hot and heavy, in more ways than one.

Get the glasses out

The character sprites are on the smaller side. Nothing like what we saw in the arcade versions of the heroes in a half shell games. This allows a TON of enemies on the screen at once. Everyone is ready to take you down with knives, guns, pipes, bats, etc. They also carry other assorted weapons that street thugs happen to have handy.

Much like playing Double Dragon, you have an assortment of moves available to defend yourself. From kicks and punches to using weapons, you are far from helpless. Attacks you have available do become a little monotonous by the time you get half way through.

To say a game will put hair on your chest may seem trite. Seriously, Crime Fighters will test your mettle as a gamer.

Brawling standards are in play

Don’t let the enemies get a hold of you for long because they fight dirty. Actually, at least once during your playthrough you will probably see one of the funniest attacks in a brawler. It happens when an enemy kicks you below the belt. For some reason, maybe the accompanying animation, this is a funny moment that doesn’t get old. I know, I need to grow up, I am working on it.

Much like other brawlers, there are no life bars for your enemies. The energy that Chi wearing, somersaulting, enemy is going to take before he goes down is a mystery. This is either a hindrance or added challenge depending on your point of view.

Bring a roll of quarters for Crime Fighter

The bosses are wacky and even more cheap than the regular foes you face in the levels. Most have a glaring pattern to them, such as the first boss – the punk rocker. While he is wildly swinging his aluminum bat, complete with nails in the end, you should steer clear of him. After a few swings of that bat he will tire and must stop to catch his breath. A few well-timed kicks and punches to the face is your best bet. Stop before he wildly starts swinging again. Watch for those patterns and you are golden. Remember, this is a game from the ’80s – patterns are everything.

Making gamers mad

I prefer Crime Fighters to Double Dragon by a mile. I recently loaded up Double Dragon Trilogy for Android in an effort to review it here but couldn’t stand it. The animation is jerky, the enemy hit boxes are WAY off, and generally I was not as impressed with DD. I was quite enamored with Double Dragon back in the day. Rose colored glasses or not, Double Dragon has not aged all that well.

I am willing to concede that the problems I had with Double Dragon I and II could be software related. What I mean is due to the port job that DotEmu did to bring them to Android. Normally DotEmu’s work is phenomenal so I naturally assumed the problems were in the original games. I am willing to check out the originals and get back to you about them in a future article.

Workarounds for the cheapness

Finding the four-player version of Crime Fighters will give you an easier time with this Konami classic. I figure four players at once would actually be a big help as the screen quickly fills with enemies. Each one is quick to gang up on a single player, or even in two player mode.

Arcade exclusive

It is an interesting tidbit that I want to share about Crime Fighters. Did you know that at no time so far has Konami released this game on home platforms? Sega was pretty lenient with games on their Genesis console so censorship would not have been a concern there. I can see why this game never reached a Nintendo console of the period though. By the time Nintendo decided to “Play it Loud” the time of Crime Fighters was long gone. Still though, why would Konami leave this game off of compilation releases over the years? Or even a release on Android using emulation but giving fans a legal way to enjoy it?

Crime Fighters is not for everyone. It is cheap, tough, and cheap again. In real life this thing is a quarter muncher to the extreme. Emulated, it is a decent romp through 80’s style brawlers. One that will probably make you rage quit a few times before you complete it.

Over on eBay you can grab a four player JAMMA board for Crime Fighters (additional hardware required to make it run at home though).

Carl Williams

It is time gaming journalism takes its rightful place as proper sources and not fanboys giving free advertising. If you wish to support writers like Carl please use the links below. https://www.paypal.me/WCW https://www.patreon.com/CarlWilliams