So Bad It’s Good: Circus Maximus for Xbox!

Imagine for a moment you could step back in time, to relive the high glory days of Rome. To compete for honor and victory in a bloody chariot race, while the cheers of the spectators and the crack of the whip echo through your ears. 2001’s Xbox exclusive Circus Maximus: Chariot Wars tried to allow players that very experience, but for a number of reasons it never achieved critical success. When the game begins the player must pick a rider and fighter, choosing from a cast of characters hailing from across Rome’s many colonies. From freakish barbarians to tribal warriors, the selection pool was great for its time and each champion added different effects to the game. The customization didn’t end there; next the players chose horses and of course chariot, each choice adding further bonuses and detriments to the race. This all sounds great and for the most part it was. However, somewhere along the road our trip to Rome veers off into the world of oddities and confusion. Yes, we may even find ourselves wondering just what the fuck the developers were thinking.

Most playthroughs went a little like this, while shrieking with reckless abandon you finally crack the whip to begin your foray into the vicious world of Rome. Unfortunately, your screams of joy quickly turn into wild barks of confusion and fury. A controller mapping system that pushes the boundaries of human limitation combines with the unwieldy size of the Xbox controller. You can only watch in horror as the tendons in your hand are stretched to the breaking point, you yell out in shock and pain (and further confusion). Desperately you engage in a button mashing delirium, trying to keep your clunky cart from crashing to its doom. Switching back and forth between rider and fighter you slash and stab with implements of war. The AI takes over as rider, causing your cart to inexplicably grind to a snail’s pace. The bots pass you by now, whipping you across the face crushing your already demoralized ego. You mash yet more buttons and helplessly watch your heroic disciple of war bob up and down like a chubby toddler in the McDonalds drive thru. Now the impossible physics works against you, one that defies even the gods of Rome. The mighty chariot stumbles and wobbles over unseen rocks. You take over for the AI, trying desperately to gain control. With one last gasp your cart falls to the roadside, your trip to Rome ends as you sob in the earth. Your cart smashed to pieces, mirroring your controller as you throw it against the television in one final bout of agitation.
While for many players this was the first experience, with time the challenge scales down in intensity. The learning curve was always a little steeper than most racing games (an unorthodox button mapping didn’t help), but the fun was eventually there. Due in part to unruly AI in solo play, multiplayer is where Circus Maximus truly shined. Four player split screen chariot racing was not to be missed, even if tensions often flared. The main selling point of the game was simple; Circus Maximus was the first and to this day still the only chariot racing game. I personally hoped it would pave the way for successors, to this day I still do. Circus Maximus had its flaws of course, but at the end pf the day it was an amazingly original concept, even if the execution left many players wanting more. No game has done what Circus Maximus dared to do; its new concept pushed the boundaries. In this day and age that sort of originality is sadly, becoming harder and harder to find. Also the popularity of the Greek and Roman theme with games such as Total War and Ryse: Son of Rome means the time may be ripe for a spiritual successor. The concept of switching between rider and fighter could be seamless on new game engines, and online multiplayer could add a whole new facet. I for one look forward to the day Circus Maximus can rise like the phoenix to be rebirthed on next gen rigs.

Glory still awaits in Rome, it’s just up to ambitious developers to claim it.

Jordan Tobin
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