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Wacky Wednesday – Godzilla (GB)

Welcome to Wacky Wednesday, a weekly wandering whereupon we wistfully wemem…remember…those wild, wonky worlds we’ve welcomed without–OK, you know what, enough of this alliterative nonsense.  I’m not Alan Moore, and neither are you.  This is just a new feature we’re throwing at the wall to see if it sticks. So here’s the deal: each week (on Wednesday, assuming we can beat our lazy editors hard enough), we’re going to bring you a look at something silly, weird, or downright bizarre involving Nintendo.  It might be an ad, it might be a screenshot with some strange dialog, it might be game packaging, it might involve copious amounts of cringe-inducing nudity and/or innuendo (probably not, but you never know…).  You’ll have to tune in to find out.  Our first presentation involves none other than an 80-meter-tall radioactive fire-breathing dinosaur slapping you the biggest high-five in the history of kaiju: Godzilla.

Yeah, now that’s what we’re talking about!  Godzilla!  A game so big it can only be contained on Game Boy.  Dozens of levels of rock-breaking “action!”  A search for Minilla, your lost son!  A reference to a James Cameron film!  A background red enough to be found on any under-21 driver’s license photo taken in the 1980s!  This ad for Godzilla has it all.  So give a terrible lizard some skin, bro.  Because Godzilla, that’s why!  He’ll be back on Game Boy, but we’ll be back next week on…Wacky Wednesday.

Michael Crisman

In 1979, Michael Crisman was mauled by a radioactive Gorgar pinball machine. After the wounds healed, doctors discovered his DNA had been re-coded. No longer fully human, Michael requires regular infusions of video games in order to continue living among you. If you see him, he can see you. Make no sudden moves, but instead bribe him with old issues of computer and video game magazines or a mint-in-box copy of Dragon Warrior IV.

If he made you laugh, drop a tip in his jar at

(If he didn’t make you laugh, donate to cure his compulsion to bang keyboards by sending an absurdly huge amount of money to his tip jar instead. That’ll show him!)

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